A Light at the End of the Tunnel
Netlore Archive: Further adventures with 'rectal foreign objects'...
Description: Urban legend
Circulating since: 1997 / earlier?
Email text contributed in 1997:
Several years ago I was awaiting treatment for an allergic reaction at New York's Saint Vincent's Hospital's emergency room. The hospital is located on the border of New York's Chelsea and Greenwich Village.
I was told to sit in a large room divided into many identical cubicles by curtains behind which each patient could have some privacy during examination.... at least in theory. Obviously you could hear something of what was going on in the next cubicle.
I became aware of a man in the next cubicle fearfully explaining to the young doctor examining him that he was experiencing pain in his rectum.The doctor positioned the man for examination. Suddenly I heard the doctor loudly exclaim in suprise.
"My god..... What the .....! I'll be right back" and I heard him rush out.
Obviously he has discovered something rare and very serious, I surmised, and he needs to consult a more experienced doctor.
Maybe two minutes later I heard the footsteps of several excited doctors rushing in. There must have been 5-6 doctors crammed in there.
"Take a look."
Then I heard one of the other doctors loudly exclaim, "What is that? He's lit up like a Christmas tree!" Through close attention (evesdropping raptly and shamelessly) it soon became obvious to me what this patient's problem was. The poor embarrassed man had a flashlight stuck up his rectum AND THE LIGHT WAS IN THE ON POSITION AND POINTING OUTWARD!
I can imagine that doctor's shocked expression when he separated the man's cheeks and lo and behold ....this bright light shining up into his face.
A light that surpasseth all understanding.
Comments: This cautionary tale comes to us courtesy of an AOL member. It's reminiscent of the various gerbilling legends that abound, with the caveat that while we have no way of knowing whether this specific anecdote is factual or not, similar incidents have been documented by medical professionals. Rather frequently, in fact!
Richard Gere and the gerbil...
Even worse than a flashlight...
Gerbilling Mishap Injures Two
A joke in the guise of "news"
Rectal Foreign Objects
From the "dangerous behaviors" file