| Who Says Lawyers Don't Have a Heart? | |||||||||||||||||
| Lawyers, that's who... | |||||||||||||||||
Dateline: 03/26/01
By David Emery
Let's hear it for lawyers, one of the few groups left in this politically correct world it's still okay to malign. There are at least as many lawyer jokes in circulation as there are members of the bar — which is to say, in the spirit of things, about ten times more than we need. The genre conveys a decidedly caustic attitude toward the world's second-oldest profession.
For example:
What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their necks in sand? Not enough sand.
Why do lawyers have the most despised profession? Because the people who make copiers keep a low profile.
Now, these are jokes you can tell at any mixed gathering without fear of censure, for even the lawyers in the room will laugh, and may well chime in with their own favorites. It's not, of course, as if they truly perceive themselves the way they're portrayed — greedy, pompous predators who get rich exploiting other people's misfortunes. In their hearts, most lawyers surely feel they are perfectly decent human beings — or at any rate no worse than politicians — who have been saddled with a bad reputation possibly deserved by other members of their profession, but certainly not themselves. They are not above the occasional act of self-immolation to demonstrate their sensitivity to public opinion.
This helps to explain the genesis of a very popular forwarded email which, whether a hoax or authentic, shows lawyers in quite an unflattering light. It originated in a law firm and enjoyed its earliest circulation among lawyers until someone — definitely a lawyer — leaked it out onto the Internet at large.
Be advised that the following message looks like a real internal memorandum, but in fact it's a fake. It did not come from Freehills as claimed in the text, but from another large international law firm. And it was indeed written — lest there be any doubt on this point — for lawyers, by a lawyer...
"No one likes to read about their own murder," the BBC has quoted her as saying. I'm sure we can all sympathize. Herbert Smith has conducted an internal investigation, accusing one solicitor-in-training in Hong Kong of authoring the fake memo and another in London of forwarding it to the outside world. The BBC reports that three other members of the firm are suspected of participating. An executive partner at the firm said it was "a rather silly thing to do." It's relevant to note how much this prank was enjoyed by those who first passed it around. Examples of appended comments include: "Making lawyers popular!!!" "Do you think one of the partners made a lame speech as her body made its final jerky exit towards the afterlife?" "No one is irreplaceable." Ahem. As one reader who forwarded the message to me observed, "Even if this is a hoax, it still shows how heartless lawyers are." Point well taken. It hardly matters whether the memo was authentic or a prank; it's callous in either case. Who says lawyers don't have a heart? Lawyers, that's who.
Herbert Smith Moves to Head Off Email Storm |
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